Musings by Taniya

Hey my darling baby boy! ❤️❤️ You growing up so fast! I see years, days and inches flying by, as you slowly become tall enough to look me in the eyes. The basket of memories overflows  And I reminisce idly by your side. You were a tiny alien when you landed in my arms Cranky angry and hungry all the time. At first you stole my peace and sleep  But you gifted me courage and bliss as years flew by. With time you showed me what irrevocable love is. Your devotion and patience amazes me. Sometimes i teach you  and somedays I am learning from you. Through thick and thin And through the ups and downs you loved and supported me unconditionally. Sure we had our bad moments And times when we drifted apart But we slowly grow and nurture  As we learn and unlearn together. Sometimes you are so wise beyond your age Sometimes I behave like a child with white hair There are days when you test my patience  And moments when I baffle you to the verge of pulling your hair. But day...

Eons ago man came up with language to communicate. Where only means to convey thoughts were actions, grunts and squeaks, now man could communicate effortlessly. Slowly migration began and we colonised the whole world. Everyone developed their own language and that's how a means that united us, became a means to isolate, divide and faction us. And today with the advent of modern civilization, the art of segregation via language continues.  Let's just talk about just our motherland for now. Our diversity in language, culture and people is no longer accompanied by unity and harmony. The ongoing drama in the southern states over imposition of Hindi is a testament to that. While hindi is a majorly spoken language in most of the regions , it is still by far not qualified enough to be a national language. To add to the same brouhaha, in comes English. Though a global language and officially the most spoken, it is a symbol of an era of colonialism that our country suffered through. As...

Today is International women's day. A day when even the most anti-feminists and conservative misogynists go on public platforms and proclaim their supposed stand for womens rights. Brands vie for women customers with catchy phrases and slogans. Discounts and special privileges for ladies are raining all over. My whatsapp is filled with congratulatory messages and wishes for women empowerment.  Ironically in many households, villages and small cities this concept is still alien and misunderstood. And tomorrow all this will become yesterday. The same women being revered, wished and enticed yesterday will be ridiculed, mistreated or ignored. Hence I used to abhor the concept of celebrating women on a single day allocated to us. The feminist in me maybe raged at the idea of a women's day when women were being raped, harassed, burnt and mistreated left right and centre. Until I saw the statistics...... I saw that so many countries still refuse to recognise women as beings that deser...

Who is my happy ending? Like in the movies n romcom  We walk towards the sunset with..... Is it my lovers who changed as the seasons change? Or my progeny I see drifting apart with growth? Is it my parents who I barely have a conversation with anymore? Or my siblings entwined in their own life? Maybe it's my besties I get together once in a while to discuss life over coffee I must say they come the closest to the one I bare my soul to. Still I don't envision myself walking towards the horizon Holding hands with any of them till the end Maybe I walk the path all alone and sad Seems so miserable n anticlimactic.  But the one thats been with me till the end Is my own soul And this body of mine That I disdained and mistreated for so long It's held my hands through pain and sorrow  laughed with me in my joy and success. It's dieted with me  and enjoyed binging and coffee dates It's the one that stayed through the highs and lows The one that knows me inside out The one th...

Are we really free  or it's a joke the world is playing on us. Every second I live and breathe, I feel judged I have to explain and answer how and why I act and speak and behave I have to justify the way I love, laugh, cry , walk and dress. The bonds of family are used to shackle me. The rent to be accepted by society is too costly.  To be free it feels like an illusion  a crime  a forbidden dream. A little bit I stray  the world ostracizes me penalizes me and breaks my soul. I wish to be a free bird but everyone wants to cage me. The prison of rules and beliefs  weighs down on me.  Imprisoning me in my insecurities and fears. I wish to be free But I wonder, can I truly ever be free?

Freedom: A concept for which we have revolted, fought wars and lost our lives. But what do we mean by freedom ? Some say it is when we are not prisoners or in control of someone else and some say it is the right to act and speak whatever we want, whenever we want. If we go by this, come to think of it, is any one of us really really free? Can we really do or say whatever we wish without someone getting offended or getting censored ourselves? Can we truly live our lives without any unwanted opinions/ judgements/ interference/ control of family or society? On another note can we truly enjoy absolute freedom without plunging the world into chaos?  After all this do we really have the independence to do anything and everything and are we really capable of appreciating it? The question that haunts us : Are we really free or we live freely in a box ?? The box that we create for ourselves, our own little world in which we feel freedom to do anything and everything without any fear. Freedo...

When was the last time we talked?  A heart to heart with no extraneous interruptions and our phones on flight mode?  How many times did we feel safe and heard baring our souls to each other? Do we even listen, talk or communicate enough or do we for the fear of judgement and ridicule, keep everything bottled inside?  We keep feeling unheard, unappreciated and unloved but when do we ever hear, appreciate or love sans prejudice? How many times do we launch into an internal monologue talking and berating ourselves or resenting others because of our self driven assumptions?  We go down a path of self-defense and reticence because we were not brave enough to bare ourselves. True strength does not lie in dealing with everything alone, it lies in our ability to communicate and open ourselves to vulnerability when we need it. It's true that people love to talk more than listen. It's easier to talk and rant or give opinions rather than truly and deeply listening without any j...